Riskytruk

How to spell yum.

2011-11-04T19:59:00.003-07:00

1) Go to the Cottage Place with the family.
2) Our 12 year old daughter ordered the Salmon Linguine with a sparkling cider - served in a fancy champagne flute. The cider, not the entree`.
3) Patty ordered the beef stroganoff
4) I ordered the spinach and goat cheese strudel
5) Wine was a Tobin James Zinfandel. Hey, it went with both mine and Patty's entrees.
6) Dessert: Daughter: Creme Brulee, Wife: Creme Brulee, Me: Pear Flambe`

7) It is so cool to have a daughter that has manners and a gourmet palate.

As If I Needed Another Reason To Drink Beer The Color Of Old Motor Oil

2011-09-10T16:56:00.003-07:00

Fun Fact Number Next:

Guinness Stout has fewer calories per gram (or ounce) than Bud Light.

Youtube Vs. Haynes manual

2011-09-05T20:34:00.002-07:00

So, I get to replace the water pump on a 1998 mini van. What does the Haynes manual say?

Disconnect battery bla bla bla... jack up vehicle...remove tire... remove hoses... remove plastic shield... remove pulley bolts... serpentine belt... reomve pump bolts... remove... engine bolts.. jack stand... timing belt..secure drive pulley so timing isn't compromised WHAT? Timing belt/chain? Engine bolts? Secure drive? SERIOUSLY?! Bla bla bla. My love for any Chrysler product grows - like Kudzu on a hillside. Yeah, that be a DIY job.

Let's read online: Mirrors Haynes manual, but also says something about experienced home mechanic can do it in 4 hours.

Hmmm. Let me look for a video - can't find one for 1998, but can for a 2003.

summary: jack up vehicle...remove tire... remove plastic shield...remove hose and be ready for a mess... remove pulley bolts...remove serpentine belt... remove pulley... remove pump bolts... remove pump... put new gasket in new pump... reverse process using new pump. Total time for inexperienced me including getting tools together and clean-up: less than 2 hours. And only minor cursing of anything made by Chrysler/Dodge/Plymouth. Not a word about timing belts or engine mount bolts. Video done by mechanics in a shop. My next garage will have a "lift."

Flagstaff Rocks!

2011-09-02T21:24:00.002-07:00

Reasons why I like living in Flag

1) Being a college town, it keeps me young
2) Rarely hotter than 90 degrees, rarely colder than minus 15 (I said RARELY - ignore
last year's minus 25 / minus 30)
3) Ice Rink!
4) Ski area less than 30 minutes from town
5) Usually bicycle friendly
6) When not #5 above, it is bicycle tolerant
7) Population fewer than 100K, greater than 50K
8) Smells like pine trees
7) People are cool
8) Grand Canyon, Meteor Crater, Riordan Mansion, etc.
9) When our idea of winter gets to be a drag, a warmer climate is 40 minutes away
10) Outdoor activities!

Two Chemical Haikus

2011-08-19T20:46:00.003-07:00

Saying incident
With hydrofluoric acid
Disturbs most chemists

Fortunately the
Incident did not involve
bodily contact

Awesome!

2011-07-24T20:04:00.002-07:00

Today, my wife had her company picnic at Ft. Tuthill. Anticipating how I usually wind up feeling restless at these events, I loaded my bike in the truck in case I felt the urge to get some activity in. After about 2 hours, my mood hit - and I was about to fall asleep - so I made my escape to the Soldiers / Highlands trail. I had walked a portion of it a year ago, and forgot some details. I wound up turning the long way on the loop part of the trail and got some extra riding in. I also was awarded some outstanding views. After crossing 89A, I meandered behind Pine Dell and hooked up with Old Munds. Awesome ride! Kudos and thanks to those who built the trail. It takes a lot longer than the shoulder of 17, but Mountainaire is now connected to flag by dirt bike tracks. I felt like a slug for splitting the event early, but at least an active slug. I also needed to compensate for the high fat cheeseburger I consumed. That and my mountain bike was bitching that although it sees a lot of dirt, I rarely take it on a single track. This is an awesome trail, steep enough to not be boring, but easy enough to be good for a gutless wonder such as myself.

The bad, the good, the bad, the good and the ugly.

2011-06-19T20:25:00.005-07:00

Father's Day Dinner Adventure:

The bad: For diner tonight, we thought we would go to Buffalo Wild Wings and have a simple and affordable dinner. We were seated at a table with several layers of a cola and beer shellac. My menu had the associated stickiness. This was no problem as I could ignore the menu, and when the waitress stopped by, I would ask for the table to be wiped off. At least 2 waiters passed by several times without acknowledging us or responding to our signals. In their defense, I doubt they noticed. After 15 minutes we left...

The good: for Busters. Within 10 minutes we were seated at a clean table and were enjoying the bread and water/drink orders. I ordered the crab cakes with a spinach salad and fresh vegetables, and a Merlot. Patty and Kim split the shrimp. Patty had a salad, Kim had soup; both had veggies. Desert came. Kim had the chocolate mousse, Patty and I each had the creme brulee. It was awesome, but...

The bad: terribly unhealthy. But it was...

The good: damn good. Seriously damn tasty. No foolin'. It came with a strawberry garnish. Fresh fruit is healthy, therefore good. Then the check came.

The ugly: We spent 3X as much as we would have at Buffalo Wild Wings. Not to mention, it will take a whole bottle of Crestor and Niaspan to undo the damage to my arteries.

Question of the day

2011-06-15T19:49:00.004-07:00

Q) What weighs 34.5 pounds, is about 17.25" at the widest point, is 35.25" tall, and is carried by a Bruin?

A) Do you really need to ask?
Hint: It is made from a silver-nickel alloy.
Hint: It is the oldest trophy in professional sports
Hint: It is really shiny
Hint: Boston 4, Vancouver 0

Canucks, I Love ya, but I love the Bruins more.

Think Seven

2011-06-13T21:10:00.002-07:00

Today's facts about 7

1) Many schools have seven periods in a day
2) There are seven days in a week
3) There are seven digits in a phone number
4) A dog ages seven times faster than a human
5) My daughter will be in the 7th grade in the fall
6) Bruins 5, Canucks 2: 5+2=7
7) There will be a game seven

(I think there might even be blood)

Oh no, a quote

2011-05-19T20:17:00.003-07:00

The following applies to my pseudospiritual side as well as the tasks that need to get done. Sort of a "If you want something done, do it yourself." approach.

I use the term pseudo in front of spiritual because I believe spiritual by itself implies observance of an unnamed, but single religion. I do not pretend to be special enough to claim any one religion as MINE.

No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path.

-Buddha

Now That's Inconvenient!

2011-05-15T19:38:00.003-07:00

So,now we need to return shopping carts to the cart corral, AND put them upside down?
It must make it a huge pain for the employees who collect them.

ANOTHER BIRTHDAY PARTY DOWN

2011-05-07T21:41:00.003-07:00

Today we had my daughter's 12th birthday party. Among her presents were:
1) A small power sander
2) An air soft gun
3) A Racquetball Racquet

I am reminded of when a young Amy Carter wanted a chainsaw for Christmas.

Fun on a Friday Off

2011-05-06T21:30:00.000-07:00

How to make nitric acid in one's nose:

After having stubborn epitaxis for over 8 hours, I had my wife bring me to the local "doc in a box" when she came home from work. The doc was nice enough to dab the problem vessels with some AgNO3. Problem solved plus now my nostril is black:) For the fellow geeks out there: AgNO3 + H2O (from the blood) ======> AgOH + HNO3And a nice tingle to boot.

Just Two Words

2011-04-08T21:37:00.000-07:00

Playoffs! Howl!

But What Happened The "P?"

2011-03-08T20:08:00.003-07:00

Awhile ago a friend gave a gift of 3 sample bottles of Jameson that she bought during a trip to Ireland. I had the final one this evening to celebrate finishing taxes. I have decided it is impossible to spell Crested Ten without the letter "o" as in smooth. Or maybe it should be smth because Jameson used all the O's.

Thanks H!!

Ask Not!

2011-03-01T19:44:00.004-07:00

50 years ago today, President Kennedy created a program that changed my life in ways that still amaze me. 24 years ago, I entered into that program and served in Thailand as a member of the United States Peace Corps. I would also like to thank all those who have served, are serving, and will serve in the armed forces. They are the ones whose sacrifices allowed me to serve in the manner I did. I left the Peace Corps smarter, more resourceful, more confident, and goal oriented than when I entered. Along the way, I helped a village do the same. It was a phenomenal experience with emotional highs and lows. Serious highs and lows. Although I left wondering if I had made a difference, when I visited 5 years later I realized that I did. I also realize the difference they made in me. It really is "The toughest job I'll ever love."

In other news, there have been requests for the "cod with chorizo" recipe, so here is the link: http://www.eatingwell.com/recipes/baked_cod_with_chorizo_white_beans.html

Happy Noshing!

A Piece Of Cod Is Not A Codpiece

2011-02-17T18:49:00.002-07:00

I had already decided to make cod for dinner tonight, but had no idea just how I would prepare it. A simple poaching in foil was too boring Breading and baking? No. frying, no. Grilling? No. Google to the rescue: Cod with chorizo and white beans! I used hot Italian sausage instead of chorizo just because. I entered into the process with great trepidation. As it turns out, it is really good. One makes a "sauce" with tomatoes, a LITTLE BIT (60g) of sausage, some white wine and white beans. This is then baked with the cod. YUMMY! try it.

Let Them Eat Cheese

2011-02-06T21:01:00.002-07:00

my team won :) although it looked as if they were trying not too. I have often wondered how many balls a team could drop in one game. I seem to have an answer.

It Might Be Cold Outside

2011-02-02T13:39:00.002-07:00

I was greeted by ice on the windowsill and corners of the window of my office this A.M. It was at least 2 cm thick in the corners.

Question of the day

2011-01-07T21:22:00.002-07:00

What if someone put melted gjetost on lutefisk?

Bangers and Mash?

2010-10-23T19:23:00.004-07:00

S0 here I am some 4 days after surgery, and am finally able to get out of the house for more than a 15 minute slow walk without great discomfort. The bruising has been dissipating in some areas while developing in others. Kind of a chameleon effect. My (specific body region) has never been that color before. Fortunately, the level of pain is less than the shade indicates. Not that there is no pain, there is as anyone who has had this surgery will attest. In response for those of you who whish to thank me for sharing: "You're most welcome." In respect for everything sacred, or at least sacred by my standards, I am not posting a pic, nor am I mentioning the specific part.

Ode to Hasbro

2010-10-19T17:08:00.003-07:00

This morning while waiting to "go under the knife" we were watching news on the TV in the waiting room. It was ironic that one of the headlines was about mess-ups in the operating room: wrong patient operated on, wrong part removed, wrong medications given during surgery, etc. I was reminded of the movie "Airplane" when the in flight entertainment was a documentary on airplane crashes. Anyway, things went fine during my hour long nap, and I am making friends with Percocet.

A Very Large Moth

2010-10-17T16:29:00.004-07:00

I saw this on an outside wall by the main entrance of the Physics building on the NAU campus. While I was taking this picture, a student copied me an also took a pic. This moth is HUGE!

Well, Duh!

2010-08-22T21:10:00.003-07:00

For some time I have known about the existence of a hiking/mountain bike trail that runs between Ft. Tuthill and highway 89A south of Pine Dell, but have never found it. I knew where the trail entered Ft. Tuthill from the North, but never had the time to follow it from there. I also knew it took off from somewhere near the Pine Mountain Amphitheater. I would usually find myself at Ft. Tuthill only 1-2 times a year, but would take the opportunity to search for it when there. Today was one of those days. As I ventured toward the amphitheater, I noticed small black arrows on small yellow square signs attached to trees. These are type used to mark nordic ski trails. I decided to take a gamble by following the arrows and was soon on a bona fide trail that connected to other bona fide trails. I folowed one till it crossed highway 89A just south of Pine Dell. Exactly as the maps showed (except for showing just where the trail hits the amphitheater) All I had to do was follow the arrows. It just goes to show - I can earn an advanced degree in chemistry, but arrows escape me. The "Pinky and the Brain" theme fills my head. Now the real scary part - I Vote!

Road Trip Recap

2010-08-21T22:27:00.003-07:00

So after decompressing for a week I finally decided to recap our trip to visit my parents in Boulder. It was kind of nice being in a population center despite the lower air quality, crowds and traffic. This is partly due to having a 11 year old daughter who is very much into Titanic stuff. Given this fact, we took a trip to downtown Denver to tour the Molly Brown Home, which wound up to be interesting. Another day and another trip to Denver so our daughter could experience some of the worst Mexican food available, but in one of the weirdest restaurants on the planet. Yes, Casa Bonita. Waterfalls, cliff divers, slapstick "gun fights"/archaeologist / pirate shows. Black Bart's hideout and free (and actually good) sopapillas. Again, REALLY REALLY BAD food. I thought it might have improved in the past 30 some years, but no. We also took another trip to downtown Denver to see the Egypt/King Tut exhibit at the Denver Art Museum. This was way cool, awesome, impressive, neat, keen, amazing, inspiring, and exciting. In uncivilized company, I sum it up in two words that can not be repeated here. Even the kids at the museum were into the artifacts.
My brother came in from Reno and we took a hike up Shadow Canyon while my dad and the women folk toured the Celestial Seasonings Tea Factory. We also visited nearly every camping/bicycle shop in the area to find a "super visible" bicycle jacket for my bro'.
Overall a great trip even with the drive with an 11 year-old and two dogs. On the trip there we let the dogs determine the breaks and stops so it took over 14 hours. The trip back, the humans ruled - 12 hours 40 minutes. Both ways via Moab.
Did I mention the King Tut exhibit was COOL? Seriously - these artifacts were on display in Denver! Yes, Denver (FINALLY)

O Canada We Stand On Guard For Thee

2010-07-21T20:12:00.006-07:00

Some men call their former girl friends when they get drunk, others call for help.

I ran across a news item about a man in Manitoba who dialed 911 (sometime last year) to demand the return of the Winnipeg Jets. Although I empathize with the man, he needs to realize 1: The Jets left Winnipeg about 14 years ago. 2: As witnessed during the last two weeks of the 2009-2010 season, Phoenicians will venture out to the worst named arena on the planet to watch hockey if the team wins a few games. 3: If the Coyotes move back north of the border, they are far more likely to land in Hamilton than Winnipeg. 4: He is lucky to have done this in Canuckistan where people understand what alcoholic beverages do to hockey fans. 5: Glendale is home to the WORST NAMED ARENA in the universe. I don't know what that has to do with the other 4, but "Jobing.com Arena?" The naming committee needs to present possible names to a group of 11-111 year old males before final approval. If there are snickers, guffaws, chortles, or laughs, the suggested name fails. Even a well-bred proper Mormon mom would shoot green Jell-O from her nose on that one.

I hope Manitoba does land a team in the future, but for now I am (Deleted Expletive) glad there is a team within 224km (metric as a nod to the denizens of "the True North strong and free") of where I live. If (when?) they leave I am likely to emulate the puck-head and dial 911 demanding the return of the team. Nobody ever said one needed to be smart to be a hockey fan. And for me even a fan of teams formerly known as the North Stars, or Colorado Rockies is a hockey fan. And as with firefighters, a brother is a brother, even if they like Dallas, or New Jersey.

Forget 12 step programs, try my 15 step program!

2010-07-20T17:38:00.005-07:00

1) Get annoyed with dripping kitchen faucet and go to hardware store and buy appropriate cartridge/stem units.
2) Come home and replace units
3) Notice faucet still drips and go to same store and buy replacement spring/seat units
4) Replace seat/springs.
5) Readjust/tighten faucet handle/stem/spring-seat units when faucet still drips.
6) Remove "bonnet" to repeat step 5, realizing I forgot to make sure water was turned off.
7) Clean up water from ceiling/floor/self. (if you think this was stupid, wait till step 8)
8) Repeat steps 5,6,and 7. (with emphasis on steps 6 and 7) Tighten everything.
9) Dance around when there are no drips.
10) Stop dancing when water leaks from every possible place - including under sink.
11) Call friend for help.
12) Mess around with the whole thing repeating the steps, but making sure water is off.
13)Finally remove faucet from sink.
14) Discover why dripping stopped, but leaking started.

15) Go to different store to spend money on new faucet, because I don't want to play with solder. (Given my talent with step 8.)
15) Install new faucet. (it probably need replacing anyway)

Fun With Construction Stuff

2010-07-06T20:54:00.002-07:00

While Flagstaff slept, alien conehead lumberjacks attacked!

Doubling Up On Typing Exercizes

2010-06-13T21:24:00.002-07:00

As the quick brown fox jumped over the lazy dog, I packed my box with five dozen liquor jugs. All right, all right, I know I took some liberties here, but I have fake poetic license. I also am seeing double, and then some. Well, letters anyway.

WAAAAAAAAH! The Season Is Over

2010-06-09T20:22:00.002-07:00

Well, it wasn't the team I wanted, (at least not publicly) but Chicago has won the Stanley Cup. The Cup, The Dominion Hockey Challenge Cup, The Holy Grail, The Meaning of Life, Life of Brian. Oops I digress. After a dismal third period, and even worse start of the overtime period for the Blackhawks, Chi town finally figured out that if they score, they win. Even in slo-mo that winning goal was damn fast. Marilee, did you have something to do with it? The good thing is that I like the Hawks and am happy to have seen them win. This hasn't happened since my older brother was a toddler. Congrats boys, and thanks to Marilee. I hope you had fun watching.

But Seriously Folks,

2010-05-19T20:07:00.003-07:00

Despite the fact I have not lived in Thailand for over 20 years, I am annoyed and saddened by the events there over the past 72 hours. Well, the past 2 months for that matter. This level of violent disobedience is most non-Thai as the Thai have a well deserved reputation for settling differences peacefully. Sometimes I think the word Thailand is synonymous with "bloodless coup." Thus, I am bewildered, perplexed and frankly pissed off at the actions of the arsonists. Although I feel for the rural poor, (I worked in international development when I lived in Maha Sarakham) I do not condone setting buildings afire. That is just inexcusable. To the people of Bangkok, Mukdahan, Khon Kaen, Maha Sarakham, Chiang Mai and other towns who are just trying to go about their business; I am truly pained to read and see the reports on the news. I wish you all peace and love.

Dive Right In

2010-05-19T20:00:00.004-07:00

Kim had her birthday party a couple of weeks ago, and I have been too lazy to post anything about it till now. We went bowling and all had a great time. This year she requested a "swimming pool" cake with her diving from a "3 meter" board. No, the board is not to scale.

We Have A Serious Series!

2010-04-25T20:20:00.002-07:00

I know this is obvious, but game 6 is over. Now on to game 7.

tuRmeric. tuRmeric. With an R

2010-04-23T21:21:00.004-07:00

Phun with puns part 1.

True story: Yesterday I ran across a string about ingredients used in cooking that claimed tumeric [sic] had cancer fighting properties. Although the responsible party forgot the first "r" they did not use an "o." This is a good thing otherwise we would have a carcinogen and wind up with a tumor. Ick.

No, I Did Not Hear The Rest Of Them.

2010-04-22T19:19:00.003-07:00

Snippets of two conversations I heard today.

1) "I know how to do it, but when I have to do it, I do it wrong."

2) "That will be good for your Adam's apple."

Both would be good primers for a creative writing assignment. Too bad they were parts of different conversations.

It Is All A Function Of Poor Humor

2010-04-21T20:26:00.003-07:00

I think we elected a number of mathematicians to the U.S. Congress. I write this because there has been a lot of discussion about regulating derivatives lately. I find it very integralesting. I wonder if higher order derivatives will be taxed at a higher rate, or if we will simply allow them to be self taxing. I do know they have been known to tax my patience.

The More I Know, The More There Is To Forget

2010-04-15T20:04:00.002-07:00

Things to remember concerning the Coyotes and Red Wings

1) At the time of writing this, the Coyotes have not lost a PLAYOFF game to the Red Wings since 1998
2) The Coyotes have not lost a PLAYOFF game since 2002

Things to forget:

The Coyotes have not been on the playoffs since 2002 and have not played the Red Wings in the playoffs since 1998

Something else to remember:

This time the Coyotes made the playoffs with some "room to spare."

Miracle on ice part II

2010-03-27T20:37:00.002-07:00

In 2003 I said, "Well, maybe next year."
In 2004 I said, "Well, maybe next year."
In 2005 I said, "Well, maybe next year."
In 2006 I said, "Well, maybe next year."
In 2007 I said ,"Well, maybe next year."
In 2008 I said, "Well, maybe next year."
In 2009 I said, "Well, maybe next year."
It is FINALLY next year and THE COYOTES ARE GOING TO THE PLAYOFFS!

HOWL!!!!

So I was watching the tube in one room and shouted to my wife and daughter who were in the other room to turn on the game to check out the "New and improved" score. There was a lull in the action for a couple of moments when the silence was interrupted by a 10 year old girl screaming "Drop the puck!" I went to the room where they were and my daughter looked at me and said, "Well the ref was just standing there so I told him to drop the puck."

I don't know where she picks this behavior. At least she didn't curse Ala V.P. Biden.

Ranting and Celebrating

2010-03-23T14:58:00.002-07:00

I have finished another journey around the Sun today and celebrated by taking a furlough day. So far I spent it by bringing our daughter to the bus stop, then driving all the way to her school to deliver her eyeglasses which she forgot, taking a mini nap, spending about 3 hours at Snowbowl. I also bought ice cream for tonight's desert and some crickets for the bearded dragon. President Obama celebrated my birthday by signing into law a piece of legislation that will increase the financial and medical security for all. Yes, for all! I reflected on how lucky I am to have employer provided health insurance, and how cool 50.34% of the house of representatives have the nerve to think nearly EVERYONE should be allowed to purchase health insurance from A PRIVATE HEATH INSURANCE COMPANY WITH THEIR OWN MONEY. I repeat: WITH THEIR OWN MONEY. Imagine the audacity to think people should not be denied insurance for no reason other than imperfect genes. It seems the remaining 49.66% of the House has a problem with people buying health insurance and want to take it away. Maybe they should start with eliminating their health insurance benefit first.

At finer bookstores nowhere.

2010-03-10T21:45:00.002-07:00

Kurt's Dictionary

March: 1) A five letter word for still snowing in Flag. 2) Statistically the snowiest month in Flag 3) Ha! You thought we were getting close to spring. 4) The month before the playoffs start.

Corrupt Chimichangas and Girl Scouts in Congress

2010-03-06T18:34:00.004-07:00

I could not decide weather to blog about inane daily activities, or take a political stance tonight, so I will do both.

For dinner tonight I decided to corrupt the general chimichanga by using multi grain tortillas, ground turkey, and mashed garbanzo beans instead of the standard ingredients. This was followed by a simply pan fry. The result was a light, clean taste, but still filling and satisfying. Of course there was cheese. I'm not THAT odd. After dinner, I contemplated the delightful congress we have. I have concluded that our congress is so ineffective that it could not pass a bill involving no public funds that would provide any U.S. citizen that wanted any, either a FREE box of Girl Scouts Thin Mint cookies or a bag of jelly beans. The Republicans would balk at the bill because it is the individual's responsibility to buy their own damn sweets; the federal government should not take care of our snacking needs. The Democrats would throw a fit because the cookies and jelly beans are not all natural and/or organic. That and Ronald Reagan liked Jelly Beans.

Geting Older With Bourbon And Voodoo

2010-02-07T21:36:00.002-07:00

While watching the big game today, it hit me during the halftime show that none of us are as young as we used to be. I was also happy to discover that things (read voices) can loosen up after a song or two. This is concerning a group of folks whose generation is about half a generation before my generation. It also hit me that I really did care who won the game, so come the fourth quarter I switched between the game and "The Simpsons" - mostly because I forgot to get some "Dixie Blackened Voodoo" and had to do something to bring some luck to the Saints. It seemed to work because during the first 'mercial for The Simpsons when I switched back I noticed things had improved. WHAT AN INTERCEPTION!!!
I hold nothing against the Colts - one of my high school/college classmates used to play for them, but the city that has hosted several "Big Games" should also produce the winner of said big game at least once. So in celebration I will need to find some place in this town that sells Dixie Blackened Voodoo. I even felt the urge to be on Bourbon Street in The Big Easy despite the fact I hate crowds - it might have something to do with wanting to get away from snow for at least one day.

Gotta Have Soul

2010-01-28T20:01:00.002-07:00

Last night I took a risk and introduced our daughter to a type of fish she has never tasted - sole. It was a pretty safe bet as she likes salmon, lobster tail and cod. She even tolerates cod in lutefisk form. The difference is that I used a little Parmesan cheese in the coating before baking it, so I was a little unsure of what the end result would be. She had two pieces at dinner and another two for an evening snack. I guess she liked it. Now she is asking for scallops.

How to make friends.

2010-01-22T19:36:00.001-07:00

Another January in Flagstaff with...

snow

snow

snow (6' fence)

and more snow

Me an' my snow blower (A.K.A. my mistress)

On my way to the neighbors to pimp out my mistress.

It's not delivery - It's homemade!

2010-01-18T19:29:00.000-07:00

Our daughter wanted a pizza for dinner, but knew we could not order one because the weather was lousy and delivery was not an option. She didn't even want to deal with driving a mile down the hill to the Mountainaire Tavern to pick one up. She was quite upset until I pointed out that we could make one. She even helped. And what a help she was.

A Very Good Day

2010-01-17T21:09:00.005-07:00

It would seem that I have been stressing over clearing the roof of snow and the driveway of ice before the next storm hits given the ever shortening window of opportunity. The stress increased during the past couple of days because I knew our daughter wanted to spend today skiing, causing me to miss a day to accomplish the tasks. This was despite my knowing that if I went to the slopes, the remaining snow on the roof, and ice in the driveway would cease to matter. How a ten year-old came to be so smart is beyond me. When one is cruising down a snow covered slope with their child on a windless sunny day, the roof and driveway don't matter. Wait--it gets better! I decided the driveway is such a lost cause I should not stress over it, and Kim got tired early so I was able to get on the roof before sunset and spent 30 minutes to remove the remaining snow from the roof. It gets even better. While I was schussing away the Vikings (one of my 3 faves) killed/embarrassed/trounced/decimated, etc. the Cowbows (a team I refuse to acknowledge as more than slime mold) 43-3. This was icing on the cake - or better yet, the chocolate ruffles/shards on the "pain in the ass cake."

2010-01-13T19:39:00.003-07:00

I realize this should have been posted nearly three weeks ago, but it wasn't so live with it. Anyway this is a U.S. Airways DHC Dash 8 being de-iced at the Flagstaff airport on Christmas morning. The temperature was somewhere between minus 5 and minus 10 creating a super cool cloud of mist. I also thought it was cool that the person doing the de-icing was 1) A woman, 2) the person who was at the ticket counter in the lobby, and 3) the person at the gate. Nothing like working at a small airport, no?

Packing Frozen Boogers In A House Of Cards.

2010-01-10T16:50:00.004-07:00

So this afternoon I was chillin' in the recliner not watching the Penguins of Madagascar with my daughter when one of them reported "The temperature is minus seventeen degrees Fahrenheit; the freezing point of snot." I find no references to the freezing point of phlegm, and I doubt I would find such in the CRC handbook, but this seems to be what I hace experienced. Boogers freeze somewhere between minus 10 and minus 20 Farenheit. If anyone has a reference to the real freezing point of snot, post it!

I was watching this insipid program instead of the Cards/Packers game for two reasons. 1) It was on and the recliner was too comfy for me to leave to get the remote. 2) I like both teams and didn't want to watch a team I like loose. 3) This is a bonus - The team I like more was down 31 to 10 at the time of this posting.

How To Flip Lefse

2009-12-19T22:22:00.003-07:00

Kim demonstrates how to flip lefse. That kid has some Norskie in her - and from both Mom's and Dad's side of the family. It sure shows.

Oh, Crap!!

2009-12-09T21:23:00.002-07:00

It is with great sadness that I report that Dakota passed away today. I do not know what happened, just that Dakota seemed fine yesterday. Kim is taking it appropriately, and even the dogs seem a tad out of sorts. The thing in the vivarium is no longer there. I found the ground too hard and frozen to dig, (believe me, I tried) and flushing Dakota or tossing her(?) in the trash was also out of the question. The solution came to be to take her to the vet for cremation - it may be a lizard, but it is a pet - and pick up the remains in a pretty little pot in a week or two. Don't ask how much it will cost. I'll leave it at this - more than a tank of gasoline, and less than a 19" or 20" flat screen TV. Kim has decided to get a new beardie within a week or two. I'll keep you posted on the name. The front runners are "Zamboni", "Colorado" and "Lefse."

Geologic Reproduction

2009-11-30T21:02:00.002-07:00

Our daughter had a tooth pulled today, and it was HUGE. Patty commented that she now has a crater in her mouth to which Kim replied "The Grand Canyon had a baby!" I'd post a pic of the tooth, but that would just be gross. Even for me.

Brotherhood

2009-11-23T20:17:00.004-07:00

As many of you may have read, I spent a chapter or two of my life playing volunteer firefighter. The bonds that form between firefighters are strong, tight and unbreakable. I doubt they ever bend. This is even true among those who can not stand the sight of each other. A brother is a brother - or sister for that matter. The bonds between firefighters who become friends can not be measured and last long after they leave the fire service. Anyway, we received a call this evening informing us that one who was particularly close suddenly passed Sunday afternoon. Steve, you will be missed. You treated our daughter as one of your own and showered her with presents every Christmas. You played Santa at seasonal fire department functions, and Kim always knew it was you. We traded dog sitting duties when we took our vacations. You and Jan (also from the fire service) invited us and others to your wedding in Hawaii. You were a brother and a friend, a father and a dog lover, a firefighter and a backyard chef, an artist and a surveyer. After I finish this post I will pour myself a second glass of wine and wait for my other 2/3 to go to bed so they won't see a brother cry. Bless you. And Jan, your brothers and sisters are always here for you. We are family. The wine and tears await.

At least I had a beer.

2009-11-21T20:47:00.003-07:00

So after the fondant and cake bit a few weeks ago, I redeemed myself by tinkering with a cloths dryer that suddenly stopped working, and then tackling the "I refuse to close" back window on our mini van. Just as I was feeling male again, I realize how I have spent much of the past 30 hours.

Friday evening: Put yest, milk, sugar, salt, and flour into my (yes, my) Kitchen Aid mixer and mix until it forms a soft, moist dough. Put dough in a bag and place in the refrigerator. Clean bowl and place lots and lots and lots (AKA about 1 pound) of butter and a little flour in mixer and mix. Form into a 5 x 6 x 1 inch block and chill in refrigerator overnight. Repeat 3 times - Hell if I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna make lots!

Saturday: Roll out 1 batch of the dough into a 10 x 17 inch rectangle. Place one of the butter/flour blocks on the dough and center it. I'd shoot for the "five hole," but I'm baking and not playing hockey. (I said to "center it") Wrap the ends of the dough around the butter block and seal. Using a French rolling pin, pound the package out to a 14 x 6 x 1 inch rectangle. If dough/butter block is still cool, roll out to a ~25 x ~14 inch rectangle. Fold into thirds so it is about 8 x 14 inches. Wrap in plastic and chill for 2 hours. Repeat for the other two batches of dough and butter blocks.
After the chill, roll the dough/butter into a rectangle about 25 x 14 inches. Fold into a 14 x 8 inch rectangle, wrap and chill for at least 2 hours. Repeat for the others. After the chill roll each batch into a rectangle about 25 inches by 14 inches - do a "wallet fold" to end up with a rectangle about 14 by 6 inches. Cut into rectangles about 6 by 7 inches. Cover each with plastic and chill for at least two hours.
Crack open a bottle of beer and take a swig. Keep beer handy. Swig as needed during the remaining process. Roll each 6 by 7 inch rectangle into a rectangle about 24 by 15 inches. Fold into a 12 by 15 inch rectangle. Cut into triangles with a base between 3 and four inches long - unfold and separate the triangles. Wrap in plastic and freeze for formation into croissant shapes on Thursday.

Where the Wild Things' Boogers Are

2009-11-15T20:32:00.004-07:00

The family finally went to see Where the Wild Things Are today, and we all liked it. Our ten year old daughter absolutely loved it, and claims it is the best movie she has ever seen - after Titanic. She was able to immediately make the connection between the wild things and Max's feelings. Simply a well done adaptation of the book. Many critics have provided negative reviews of the adaptation due to the slight darkness of the film, the focus on Max's rage and childish expression of it. Ummm - Max is a child so his dealings with it will be childish. Duh! I think these folks were expecting a film suited for a three year old. I remind them that although the book is written at a level suited for early readers, the story is for a slightly older group.

In other news, my daughter has decided that she will refer to all biologists as "Boogeroligists." I wish there were some clue to where she gets it.

Fun with Fondant

2009-11-02T10:09:00.004-07:00

I was asked to make a cake for a friend's birthday, and decided to try working with fondant. From a distance it looked great. Up close it showed the mark of a fondant virgin and I had to use some leftover butter cream frosting to cover the defects. I was hesitant to use fondant due to its reputation, but a little raspberry flavoring and it turned out just fine. My daughter even made one of the flowers. I also think I need a night with the boys before I do something even gayer than cake decorating.

Saturday Night in Phoenix

2009-10-19T17:54:00.003-07:00

A great way to spend a Saturday Night in the Valley. Even better was Coyotes 4, Bruins 1.

Dive Right In

2009-10-11T18:48:00.001-07:00

My daughter had her first dive meet yesterday, and can't wait for the next one. She has been diving for only 4-1/2 months so she has a lot to feel good about. I wonder what she will be doing in another 5 months.

One Down, Many To Go

2009-10-03T22:25:00.002-07:00

New Season, new coach. Desert Doggies 6, Kings 3. HOWL! Lets hope I howl my voice out during the next 6-8 months. It's only one, but it's better than none. Once again HOWL! Oh, the Lumberjacks won too! But... The Buffs lost on Thursday and the Rams trail Idaho as I write this.

2009-09-24T18:47:00.002-07:00

Has it really been this long since I added to this blog? I guess so. I often think I have nothing to blog about, but when I get going there is little one can do to stop me. About 2-1/2 months ago we cleaned our daughter's fish tank as usual, but I probably added too much algicide and the two fishies were dead the next morning. For the previous year, Kim has been asking "When my fish die can I get a hamster?" And we would say "No." and enumerate the reasons why - including the noise, odor, mess, and general pain in the buttness of having a hairy rodent in the house. Anyway we were now victims of the question: "Do I get a hamster now?" I responded with a "How about a lizard?" as I braced myself for a "Ewwwwwwwww, NO NO NO NO NO! I want a hamster!" I did not get that. As we were due to go a vacation in a few days, an immediate replacement was out of the question, but we did go directly to a pet store. Within half an hour she had decided on a bearded dragon, AND picked the name DAKOTA. Dakota has been a great addition to our house and I hope to write about the reptile often.

Splish Splash

2009-08-20T20:15:00.001-07:00

A whale of a good time at Seaworld!

Coolness in Carlsbad

2009-08-15T19:01:00.004-07:00

I usually avoid things that I think might be cheesy like the plague, thus it was with much trepidation that I allowed myself to enter the SEA LIFE AQUARIUM associated with LEGOLAND and located just outside the main gate to the monument to Danish building blocks. The anticipated curdled aged milk quality of the edifice waned as soon as I came across the tank of shark embryos. (expletive deleted) COOL!

The Little Young Lady From Carlsbad

2009-08-14T19:11:00.004-07:00

One of our daughter's favorite things at LEGOLAND was the cars that kids get to drive. There is a course set up not unlike the courses we had during driver's ed classes in the seventies. The difference is that someone dumped money into this one so there are actual curbs and traffic lights. That and the kids cars are battery operated and go slow. Anyway here she is a few moments before getting her laminated driver's license.

You Could Complain, But That Would Be Piddly!

2009-08-11T19:08:00.006-07:00

Yesterday I blogged about the detail of the displays at LEGOLAND. Today I continue this string. As many of you know, I played volunteer firefighter for a number of years, and although that chapter of my life is closed, I still am drawn to things firefighter. I am also drawn to juvenile and crude humor. This explains why I loved this particular lego construction of the quintessential dalmatian and hero firefighter.

Then I got another view and loved it even more.

Seeing is Believing

2009-08-10T17:17:00.003-07:00

During our trip to LEGOLAND we we impressed with the displays made out of legos. I fund some of the attention to detail particularly fascinating; not only were the people in the stands good, but the side of the Capitol had an added element that many would overlook.

The Port-a-Potties! With people waiting to use them!

Thin air kills brain cells

2009-07-25T17:20:00.003-07:00

We mountain dwellers tend to despise heat, so it is natural that we head off to Palm Desert with two other mountain dwelling families in late July for a week of vacation. Monday is supposed to be 114 degrees. Sounds like a good day to head off to legoland and cool off in the sub 80 degree weather.

Row, row, row your boat.

2009-07-19T20:38:00.004-07:00

I have frequently wondered about the logic of heading to "the lake" for the day. I have always thought that being confined to a shadeless expanse of blazing sun was a form of torture reserved for international terrorists. I am not talking about fishing. Spending the day fishing makes sense to me, but just hanging out at the lake has often baffled me, so when one of our daughter's friends decided to have his birthday party at Lake Mary complete with canoes and kayaks, I feigned enthusiasm, dreading baking under the 95 degree sun for 3 hours. Besides, I had not paddled a canoe in over 20 years. Anyway, Saturday we headed off to the lake for a day baking in the sun for three hours. The result: After 5 (3 was not enough) hours paddling canoes and kayaks in the sun I have concluded I WANT A CANOE, I WANT A KAYAK, I WANT A TRAILER OR RACK TO HAUL SAID TOYS TO THE LAKE. I WANT A CANOE OR KAYAK. I WANT A KAYAK OR CANOE. I WANT BOTH! I WANT BOTH NOW! I am also pissed off that nobody ever told me that a day at the lake is fun. Nobody told me that one simply ignores the heat and sun. (is this enough sarcasm?) Maybe somebody could profess that there is logic in heading to "the lake" for the day.

This better not last long

2009-07-17T20:16:00.003-07:00

How hot is it?

1) So hot that the Phoenicians stay in the valley because it isn't worth the drive

2) The fish are fried right out of the lake

3) People head to the kitchen because they can't stand the heat

4) The folks in Flagstaff complain about the heat

Aging Dog And New Trick

2009-07-16T20:45:00.003-07:00

This evening, our daughter became bored and wound up putting on her inline skates, heading off to the road with Patty and practicing skating. I took the hint and put mine on as well. The idea of strapping wheels on ones feet never made sense to me as I am more of a metal blade on a boot guy, but I have a pair of "eBay special" inline skates for just such an occasion. The problem is that my inline skates have no brakes, thus I need to do a power slide to stop. Err, learn how to power slide to stop. Err, learn to power slide on asphalt to stop. Err learn to power slide on asphalt on a slight downhill grade in the dark to stop. Oh, what the heck, I'll just spin and change directions, or coast until the downhill becomes level. I'll learn the power slide some other day.

Life Is A Cartoon

2009-07-15T20:49:00.004-07:00

This morning as we were tooling along Mountainaire Road on our way to town, Mr. Wile E.Coyote traipsed across the road about 25 yards in front of our car. I have frequently heard the mangy doggies yipping in the evenings when I am on our back deck, and have seen an occasional one in fields beside highways, but have never seen one on the roadway itself. Let alone that close to houses. I was reminded of a year or two ago when our daughter spotted a roadrunner (yes, it really was - papa and daddy saw it too) near our house. This was unexpected as they do not usually hang out at this elevation. I guess I'll have to wear one of my (in)famous cartoon ties come payday to celebrate. That and avoid cliffs. And anvils, and anything made by the Acme company. In any event we continued with trepidation just in case there were phony panoramas or "instant hole" residue along our path. Beep Beep!

I hope He Wasn't Called Home Without It.

2009-07-01T19:17:00.005-07:00

Okay, Okay Johnny, I understand you need to get a show together, but you already had your announcer and two guests. Do you really need a pitch man for the ads, a comedian, and a tried and true veteran actor? I hate to admit that I thought Karl had already passed, but I have been proven wrong. Do they take the American Express Card in the afterlife? And will The Streets of San Francisco ever be safe again?

The Tonight Show In The Afterlife

2009-06-25T20:10:00.004-07:00

Well it would appear that Johny Carson is preparing a show in the afterlife and has called for his announcer and two special guests for the show. Ed can once again declare "Here's Johnny!" and later make room for Farrah and Michael on the couch. The angel is finally out of her pain and suffering. Farrah, you remained beautiful until the end. I find it a rip-off of sorts that her passing will be obscured by the passing of Michael Jackson who has delt with his own pain over the years. This feeling of Farrah being cheated stems from her days in Charlie's Angels when I was in junior high school and like many males between 10 and 110 was "enchanted" by her beauty. In other words, she was a babe - something I never felt about Michael. I do not want to take anything away from Michael, but I have disliked most of his work since 1980 - I even think Thriller was a waste that fell light years short of the hype surrounding it. Anyway, it should be a good show. I wonder if Carnac the Magnificent will be there.

The Return of Ullr

2009-06-15T19:02:00.003-07:00

A week or so ago, I blogged about Snowbowl and courts and Ullr. Well, it seems that Ullr came through again in the Coyoted/Hamilton drama. I just hope the management of the team gets their act together and gets that arena packed. I might suggest realizing that there is more of Arizona than Phoenix, and doing some PUBLICIZED appearences in NORTHERN (read Flagstaff) Arizona. Perhaps have a Northern AZ night, or offer a game/hotel package for those who do not want to dodge elk on I-17 at midnight on icy roads after the game. Anyway, Praise Ullr again.

Thank You Pens!

2009-06-12T20:45:00.004-07:00

Note to engraver:

Dear Engraver,

When you come to Mr. Crosby's name, think of the town in Nebraska, NOT the city in Australia. In other words use the letter "i" instead of "y." It will be correct and not use any more space on the cup.

Get some rest boys, you have all earned it! As for the Red Wings - Heck of a 7 games; you helped me de-stress by making me scream at the T.V. Again - GOOD series. I'll see ya in October!

I just realized this means the season is over - DRAT!

Riskytruk Gets Religopolitical

2009-06-09T17:33:00.002-07:00

Yesterday, the supreme court decided not to review the En Banc decision of the ninth circuit court of appeals regarding Arizona Snowbowl using treated waste water for snow making. Although I am sympathetic to the views of the environmentalists and Native Peoples, I am not disappointed in the decision. Nor do I applaud it. I believe that the treatment process removes all the poopies and pissies from the effluent and the argument that using treated waste water is akin to using sewage for baptisms is pure manure. I also believe that the treatment process in question does not remove all the chemical residue from medications, drugs and cleaning products, thus I am reluctant to imbibe the fluid. The opposition should focus on this argument, not the poop/piss issue. Furthermore, although I do ski, it is not simply recreation. I feel commanded by Ullr to ski - whenever and wherever. It is a spiritual experience for me, and given the fact that my ancestors worshipped Ullr, it is a religious issue. In short if allowed to move forward, Ullr will teach the Kastinas skiing while the Kastinas will teach Ullr some spiritual dance steps. So in short - Glory to Ullr! Now I just need to wait for the decision on the Coyotes/Hamilton issue. Since this is a winter sport issue, perhaps Ullr needs to get involved again.

AZ flexes some muscle.

2009-06-04T19:30:00.003-07:00

It would seem that the University has decided to pay attention to the issues surrounding how the the chemical fume hoods and the HVAC system behave in the lab building when the fire alarm goes off. (Either when tested or when a detector reads steam from a autoclave as smoke) - Thanks to to some prodding from the State Fire Marshall. It was something like this: Fix it or the building is closed in 10 days! (this would mean June 10th) Funny how something that has been an issue, but ignored by the upper tier of deciders for 30+ months becomes urgent. I mean URGENT!! A priority. Something that needs attention NOW! The good good folks at facilities have made great progress in the past 3 days. I just hope the wall of Fire Detector Company, Fume Hood Company, and HVAC Company can overcome their paranoia of proprietary information and start talking to each other so our folks can make the systems "talk" to each other and operate as they should. I expect this is like a 1980's Michael Stipe conversing with Ozzy Osbourne and Bob Dylan.

Exercise Is Good For Us

2009-06-01T19:56:00.003-07:00

Again, I found myself riding my bicycle 10 miles to work for no reason other than I can. Although there is little NET elevation gain, there is a three mile climb up a moderate hill followed by about 2 miles of near level, but downhill. The trip ends with a very gradual uphill for the last mile. I usually question my wisdom once I am halfway through the moderate uphill portion, but realize once things level off that the climb was not that bad. The good news about this is I arrive at work energized and ready for work. I get the aggression out in a productive manner so when the day starts turning to crap, I remain calm. Today was a good day for this. I realized that the file for the inventory did not load correctly. When I went to reload it, I realized that the battery is old, does not hold a charge, and the file is no longer stored in the memory of the Telxon. So I ordered a new battery and plan to rescan everything in a week or so. The day got worse from there. By 15:00 I was snickering over the state of things in my world at work. Even better is that anything that revealed itself after 10:00 is not my fault, and well beyond my control. I am now preparing myself for the fallout for those things I do not control. Could be fun. Probably won't.

Do Not Plant A Garden Yet!

2009-05-31T14:10:00.002-07:00

This morning when I let the dogs outside, they both went for a slide as they slipped on the ice that had formed on the deck. I then looked at the roofs in the neighborhood and saw they were all covered with frost. Later on in the morning as we drove into town, we saw a fresh layer of snow on the peaks. It looked like it was down to 9,000'. This is why I refrain from planting a garden until AFTER the first week of June. I will have fun next week explaining to vendors what happens at 7,000' elevation next week when they ask if we are hot here in AZ.

Has Anyone Seen A Canoe Lately?

2009-05-30T17:04:00.003-07:00

What is up with this rain? First we had a dry March, then a warmer than normal April which caused fears that we were in for a long hot dry summer plagued with forest fires. May came along and started normally, (dry and windy) but suddenly has been acting near monsoonal. Don't get me wrong, we really need the rain, but it seems out of place for May. I just hope we still have the monsoon in July.

A Man And His Dogs

2009-05-28T19:56:00.003-07:00

Tuesday night we rented and watched Marley And Me, a movie I have been avoiding watching due to a fear that I might react to it in a most non-male manner. There is something about movies mixing end of life and canines that will stir deep emotions in boys and men. The reactions in such flicks are stronger than during Bang The Drum Slowly or Brian's Song. If one wants to test the sensitivity of a grown man, plop him down in front of a T.V. set (or movie screen) and show him Old Yeller, or similar. As Marley And Me ended, I thought of the pets my family or I have had and how they left this earth. Towzer, a wire hair terrier died as a result of a dog fight where he was on the receiving end of 3-4 other dogs punishment. He was the dog I knew as a child and died when I was in the 3rd or 4th grade. During his final hour, I was busy playing a hockey game that my team lost. My brother's dog, Bear, an Old English Sheep Dog mix that he got when I was in the 4th grade succumbed to kidney failure when I was in college. When I was a Junior in college, my brother's next dog had a litter and I was given a pure white Shepherd/Malamute/Siberian mix with one blue eye and one brown eye. I named her Freyja and nicknamed her the "white wolf." She died suddenly some 7 years later while I was working for the forest service in South Dakota. Her litter mate, Marja died of old age a few years later. My wife had a poodle, Frisky, who suffered from old age/kidney failure was put down in the late '90s. Tungsten, a Siberian/Malamute/Whatever mix died after a seizure somewhere around 2001. Zmboni, a whatever mutt mix became ill, (some form of enteropothy) and was put down at the young age of 4. Narvik, another Husky mix died of old age 2 days before I was going to "do the deed." To this day, I believe she let herself go to save me the pain. I remember having lunch at a restaurant with friends when I felt a sudden "flash" and knew she had passed. Despite my daughter being alive for Tungsten and Zamboni, she was old enough to understand the finality of Narvik. For the next year, she blamed her grouchy moods on the loss of Narvik. This continued until we let her know that Narvik was no longer an excuse. We currently have a Yellow Lab named Star and a medium sized black "Rez Special" named Bear. I am not prepared for when what happens in movies happens to them. When the time comes, I will need to watch a movie about a sports hero who contracts a terminal disease and dies a long, painful agonizing death to cheer myself up.

A Golden (Or Maybe Amber) Opportunity

2009-05-12T15:14:00.003-07:00

For whatever reason, I have become more aware of television ads for law firms lately. I am sure you have seen them too. They tell of the devastation that has occurred after/during/as a result of certain medications that one may have received during surgery. Many of these involve "life saving" procedures. I even saw one the other day that was for denture adhesive. Yes, it is a tragedy that people have been harmed or died as a result of something that was done during surgery. It is a tragedy that people have been harmed or died as a result of a medication. I do take issue when the immediate reaction is to sue for the highest amount ever awarded. Again, I believe the individual would have died without the procedure, ( IN SOME CASES!) therefore question the belief that they died because something went wrong with a blood thinner/procedure/dental adhesive. I am sensing an opportunity here. Shoelaces that become untied, causing one to trip, fall and suffer an injury or even death. I am sure some brands of shoelaces are more prone to this than others. How about beer. Imagine the voice over: Have you or a loved one been injured after failing to correctly ambulate due to compromised coordination as a result of consumption of this dangerous beverage? Numerous women have even said yes to intercourse and wound up pregnant after a night of drinking. Even more men have succumbed to a condition known as "beer goggles" and spent the rest of their suffering ridicule from their friends. Please call the law firm of Dewey Cheetham and Howe. You may be entitled to a large settlement.

If You Experienced Great Service, Ring The Bell.

2009-05-07T19:58:00.003-07:00

The sales rep gave me a phone number to call to get my order status.
I dialed the 1-866 number.
Recorded Voice: Thank you for calling ________, for order status press 1.
I press "1."
R.CV: For order status, press 1.
I dutifully press 1
R.V.: That option is not valid. Good bye. (click)
I repeat cycle with same results
I Repeat again. - same results.
I try again, but do not press anything and wait for other options.
R.V.: We did not understand your response - good bye. (click)
I determine the site is temporarily down and go to bed. ( The store was closed at this time, so it was pointless to call the sales guy.)
Morning comes and I try again
Same results.
I repeat with a corded phone and get the same results
I try one more time
R.V.: For order status, press 1.
I press 2(!) - I was feeling rebellious
R.V.: For order status, press 1
I obey, thinking I can press 2 a second time next time. Hell, I'm ready to work my way through the numbers. I might even try calculating delta T, S, or even U if necessary - I've still got my old P. Chem books.
R.V.: Please hold while we access your information -- your delivery will arrive today between _____ and ____. Thank you for using _____.
I was so surprised, I nearly did a number 2. Which makes sense seeing as number 1 was only pissing me off.

Bowling For Birthdays

2009-05-04T17:25:00.004-07:00

Our daughter had her birthday at the bowling alley Saturday. It was a blast as all the kids as well as adults had a great time. I have found these work out much better that the ones held at "Upchuck Cheese" and clones thereof. This is our daughter attempting to pick up the spare. Is she ready for the pro bowler tour?

An Uplifting Sight

2009-04-30T07:03:00.003-07:00

A family of ladders has moved in across the street. How cool is that?

German soliders and the CDC.

2009-04-28T19:03:00.004-07:00

There seems to be something in the news lately about public health. Something about farm animals and influenza. What could it be? Hmmm. Could it be swine flu? Yep, and the media have another topic to talk to death. I am not meaning to belittle this sometimes fatal infliction, but wish to put it in perspective. In 2007, there were over 4,500 pedestrian deaths due to accidents with cars. There were an additional 70,000 pedestrians injured due to the same. Yet we all still cross the street just as many fail to wash their hands after using the bathroom or before eating. Just think of all the boogers that have been wiped on door handles and banisters. It does not matter if it was intentional or not, the treasures are there and it 'snot funny. The same folks who refuse to practice this simple hygiene measure are the same ones who are avoiding pork products in an effort to stay healthy. Yo, booger brains, one does not get swine flu from eating swine, one gets it from being in contact with an infected swine, or being in contact with one who has been in contact with one who has been in contact...with an infected swine.

I did, however, read something interesting about this particular strain. It seems that the ones who are dying from it are the ones healthier than the normal population. There is speculation that these individuals have a stronger immunity, thus a stronger immune response. It is the strong response that is killing some of them, not the virus itself. As Arte Johnson would say "Veeeeery interesting." If you have to ask, you're a pup.

Q and A time

2009-04-25T21:04:00.003-07:00

Q) When it it better to be flightless than to be a flier?

A) When flier is spelled with a "y", and the flightless entity is an Antarctic bird from Pittsburgh.

Translation) Go Pens!

Adaptation

2009-04-23T19:08:00.003-07:00

A few months ago, my wife's work schedule changed from 7:00 AM-4:00 PM M-F (which matched mine) to some random permutation of starting at 6:00 or 7:00 to 2:00, 3:00 or 4:00. This had potential to cause strife in our daughter's life as she loves to have Mommy drop us off on the way to her work and we ride bicycles the last mile to her school. Our daughter believed this work schedule means we can only do this on occasion. She was quite upset until I mentioned on the 6:00 days I can drive us to the same parking lot where we get dropped off on the 7:00 days. This is just what we started doing and all is happy. I get more riding and exercise too. The big problem might come in August when the parking pass expires and I am reluctant to purchase a new one due to a nearly 50% increase in the price. While I understand the reluctance of having taxpayers pay for my parking pass, I have issue with paying to park where I work, considering there is no public transit where we live. Also a parking pass does not guarantee I will have a parking spot. The other point is that I can do the street parking thing and be closer to work than the campus parking lots I normally use but, this would not work for the ride to our daughter's school. Hmmmm. Maybe I should just buy the cheap pass for the dirt boondocks lot that sucks for where I work, but is good for the ride to Ms. K's school. I can always do a pro-rate upgrade in November when the snow starts to fly, the temperature drops and darkness rules the early morn.

Dear Santa

2009-04-16T18:16:00.002-07:00

Dear Santa,

I know I like cold weather, and despise hot days, but since it is the middle of April I should add a caveat. My love of cold is confined to November through March, after that I do permit days over 45 degrees. I know this is your down time and you are on vacation, but I would like a warming trend. It is okay if the trend ends at 75 degrees, after all if I wanted hot weather I would have moved to Phoenix.

Did I Mention Wind

2009-04-15T17:45:00.003-07:00

How To Tell If It Is Spring In Flagstaff

1) Wind
2) One day is in 60+, a couple of days later it is 30-ish with snow
3) Two days later it is back to around 60
4) Repeat 2 and 3
5) Wind
6) Wind
7) People are walking around dressed in tees, shorts and flip flops when it is 30 degrees, windy and snowing as they complain about being cold.
8) Wind

A Guest Blogger Tonight

2009-04-14T17:00:00.002-07:00

Because I do not feel up to blogging this evening, I am turning the task over to my daughter. And away we go...
Today 97 Years ago the Titanic hit an ice berg at 11:40 pm and will go down on the 15th I am so sorry a lot of people died.

Sociopathopolitical Commentary #next

2009-04-12T20:42:00.003-07:00

Well it seems that our planet lost 3 pirates today, and I have a hard time feeling sorry for them. Modern piracy creates millionaires when ransom for crews is paid and cargo is sold on the black market. In addition when some pirates return to their villages, they are treated as heroes - not the criminals/terrorists/murderers they are. I am not some opinionated redneck spewing drivel. I am well aware of the desperation that poverty creates and believe that a full attack on the elements that create poverty are in order. I do, however have a hard time believing that the millions and millions that have been paid to pirates for release of ships and crew has gone to reduce suffering in Somalia or anywhere else. These payments have strengthened war lords, reduced freedoms increased starvation, illness and violence making the world a more dangerous place. Kudos to the Navy Seals for their actions today, and the French for their efforts last week. All I can hope for is that the next container vessel taken by pirates if carrying nothing but Peeps. Imagine the fun of pirates trying to unload millions of yellow, purple, pink, blue and white marshmallow treats among a population that is striving to find clean drinking water. I will not comment on how I feel about any children and wives of the pirates because I do not wish to be labeled as a liberal who "does not get it."

It's This Simple

2009-04-03T20:28:00.002-07:00

Diablo Burger Rocks!

Good food, friendly service, locally produced ingredients.

Is My Life Exciting, Or What?

2009-04-01T20:14:00.003-07:00

I have been suddenly spending a lot of time looking at EBAY for useless items I do not need. Among these items are a "new" ipod shuffle, (my old one worked fine - I just wanted a 2nd gen one) a new puck case to replace the one I gave to my daughter for her puck signed by Todd Fedoruk, a hubcap for a '98 grand voyager, and a case for my daughter's Nintendo DS. I have bought more crap(?) on EBAY in the past month than I have in the past 18 months combined. It is, nonetheless, a good place to find things that are hard to find, have been discontinued or are overpriced elsewhere. The puck case is a good example; the store I used to get them at has discontinued nearly all of their hockey stuff. Damn them! Not just the Flag store either - it appears that all their Phoenix metro stores have done the same. I realize that hockey stuff is not the best seller in AZ, but they need to be aware that hockey fans MUST HAVE HOCKEY STUFF. Merchants must deliver before we start chanting BLOOD BLOOD BLOOD while carrying broken sticks. Hockey fans without hockey stuff is like Sturgis running out of beer during the rally. Bad idea. Hmmm this is turning into a rant over a piece of plastic. This must mean the answer to the title question is an "Or what."

2009-03-22T20:39:00.002-07:00

With the date where I conclude another trip around the sun approaching, my wife and daughter conspired with a friend to treat me to something special at a hockey game last Tuesday. In longer terms: (You know the tune - sorry to the Gear Daddies for the following liberties)

I went down to the Coyotes arena
Where I met the P.R. gal
She came from her office, said "Sir, you must be he."
I looked back at her and said "Yes I am."

I get to ride the Zamboni... Hey
I get to ride the Zamboni - Yes I do.

Now ever since I was young, it's been my dream
That I might ride a Zamboni Machine
I'd wave to the fans as proud as could be
And all the kids would wave back at me

I get to ride the Zamboni
I get to ride the Zamboni - Yes I do!

Now the P.R. Gal said "Man that looks keen."
And that she's never rode that expensive machine
And she's been helping folks ride for years
And she loves it so much she gives them cheers.

Yep. I got to ride a Zamboni right before the game. My daughter acted wild just (seconds) before the puck dropped and got her pic on the big screen. AND..AND...AND the desert doggies actually won. The P.R. woman was way cool, and said she had the best job in the world because she takes hockey fans downstairs to ride the Zamboni. This is something all hockey fans love to do. My wife and daughter tried to take some pics, but none turned out well. Probably because I was moving and the glass makes things blurry. Anyway here is one attempt. (Thanks to my wife, daughter and H)

Can U Cipher And Drive At The Same Time

2009-03-15T17:53:00.004-07:00

As I age I find that I sometimes drive slower than molasses on a Minnesota midwinter midnight (AKA about the speed limit.) This usually does not prove to be an issue unless it is on a 7 mile long 2 lane winding road terminating at Snowbowl. For some reason people want to drive over 50 MPH on this posted 30-35 MPH road in the hopes that they will get more skiing in if they reach the parking lot 3-4 minutes faster. So they pass me in the no passing zone (the entire road.) I keep thinking they will be stupid enough to take the corners at a high rate of speed, but they seem to come to their senses for those. I know these 3-4 minutes are important because I see these folks in the parking lot farting with their mp3 players and other accouterments d' ski/snowboard. Despite their rush to arrive quickly, I still manage to make it on the lift before them. On the other hand because I ski like the aging fart I am, they beat me down the hill and on the lift for the next trip down the slope. Once at the top of the lift, there is more farting with the previously mentioned equipment and the cycle repeats. Oh, the snow is still adequate for skiing, but probably wont be by the weekend. The demands from the piece of plastic from Arizona Snowbowl that I wear around my neck will have to go unanswered until more snow falls.

Trying To Find My Way Back

2009-03-12T19:45:00.003-07:00

I have suddenly realized that my blog has lost it's original edge of anti-seriousness and sarcasm. This is due to an extreme dose of paranoia that anything I write may be used against me in the future. I could be on trial or serve as a witness someday and have to answer to items in this blog. That is why I refrain from making comparisons between a specific upper level administrator at a specific institution of higher education and fictional humanoids with hairy feet that live in dwellings with round doors. I'm sure we can envision it now: "Now then Mr. R," said the attorney with a lilt of smugness in his voice, "Is it not true that you said the president of the university and the local mayor could get a 2-for-1 special on What Not To Wear?" I would reply something like, "No, it is quite true." The prosecution would then inquire "No, it is true?" I would then be kind enough to point out the use of a double negative in the attorney's original inquiry. That combined with the likelihood that I would be wearing a cartoon character necktie would seal my fate. So it's a good thing I don't compare people to Hobbits.

And Now The Instant Replay

2009-03-11T19:58:00.003-07:00

See the previous blog for what happened at 3:30 on Monday afternoon. Except this time I made the important call when the alarm went off. I was also leaving for an appointment at the exact instant the alarm sounded so I do not know if there was an odor issue. Today, I was thanked by the building manager for my prompt call to him. As it turns out, the fire detectors in the autoclave rooms are set for smoke, not heat so when steam is released, the detectors think it is smoke and sound off. They will be reset for temperature to avoid repeated soundings.

Hot and Steamy Times in the Science Lab Building

2009-03-09T18:26:00.003-07:00

Friday afternoon one of the autoclaves in the building released a larger than normal cloud of steam. Kind of like a mechanical fart. This set off the fire alarm, sending the occupants out into the chilly wind. Meanwhile inside the building, the HVAC shut down as it is supposed to when the alarm is activated. Although most of the sophisticated system reactivates when the alarm is shut off, the "make-up air" does not. This results in numerous odors accumulating in the building resulting in an aroma not unlike ass. This makes sense as vapors/fumes from the can, drains, etc are part of the intoxicating environment. After a couple of calls, the HVAC was working properly and the building smelled like a building and not a forest service outhouse. The moral of the story is: Don't fart in an enclosed space.

Geek Alert

2009-03-03T07:39:00.003-07:00

Today being 3/3/9 is one of nine square root days a century. I think I'll celebrate it by doing something square. I could 1) eat only square meals, 2) watch Sponge Bob Squarepants, 3) act like a square 4) make sure all corners are square or 5) go square dancing. It is also the day of the science fair at my daughter's school. How cool is it for it to fall on square root day? We will have to wait for April 4th of 2016 for the next one. How will you observe the occasion?

Rest In Peace Of The Story

2009-02-28T20:34:00.003-07:00

Somewhere around 3-4 decades ago, I could not figure out why my dad would enjoy listening to Paul Harvey. After all, my pop has definite liberal leanings, and someone as nerdish as Paul had to be a die hard conservative. As I aged, I came to appreciate Mr. Harvey's comments and delivery thereof; I saw his show not one of political ideology, but one of education and entertainment. I will miss him and what he meant to broadcasting. He gave lessons without being preachy, insulting or provocative. I know his son has taken over much of his broadcasting, but I am left wanting more of "The Rest Of The Story."

How To Celebrate A Warm Day

2009-02-25T17:35:00.003-07:00

A succession of warm days has been a catalyst for some exciting after work activities:

1) De-poop the part of the back yard that isn't covered with snow
2) Sweep out the garage
3) Sweep off the "apron" in front of the garage
4) Move the can of gas for the snow blower from the garage to the shed
5) Replace the furnace filter
6) Celebrate 1-5 above by putting air in the bicycle tires and going for a short ride